Boundaries Training Resources:
Boundary Training Slides (powerpoint file)
UM Sexual Ethics (1-800-523-8390)
Boundary Book Resources:
Saying No to Say Yes: Everyday Boundaries and Pastoral Excellence by David Olsen and Nancy G. Devor is an essential guide for pastors seeking to avoid the dual pitfalls of entanglement in congregational drama and burnout. It provides pastors concrete guidance on how to draw boundaries that facilitate community engagement while still maintaining the crucial distance that fosters enduring leadership.
Healthy Disclosure: Solving Communication Quandaries in Congregations by Kibbie Simmons Ruth (Author), Karen A. McClintock discuss the ways knowledge is shared in a congregation that can build up or break down community. Unfortunately, congregations can easily fall into patterns of communication that lead to disastrous interpersonal and organizational outcomes. Even in times of crisis, however, congregations can learn and practice new skills and healthy communication management
Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott is a master class on positive change through powerful communication. To do that, she explains, you must transform everyday conversations at work home and at church with effective ways to get your message across. This book prepares you to overcome barriers to meaningful communication, expand and enrich relationships with colleagues, friends, and family, increase clarity and improve understanding, handle strong emotions—on both sides of the table and connect with colleagues, customers and family at a deep level.
Sex in the Parish by Karen Lebacqz and Ronald Barton examines the gift of sexuality in relation to the parish and the dynamics of sexual desire and temptation. Included in this book are the experiences of a pastor who did not set appropriate limits; explanations of how the pastoral role affects sexual contact between pastor and parishioner; suggestions for a framework of ethical analysis; an examination of questions for women in ministry, single pastors, and pastors who are gay, lesbian, or bisexual; and a review of ethical issues related to persons who carry responsibilities for the structures of ministerial practice.
Caring Enough to Confront: How to Understand and Express Your Deepest Feelings Toward Others by David Augsburger is a classic in Christian peacemaking. It teaches the reader how to build trust, cope with blame and prejudice, and be honest about anger and frustration. He offers a biblically based model for dealing with conflict to teach Christians how to confront with compassion and resolve issues in a healthy and healing way.
Rising Strong by Brené Brown details her pioneering work that uncovered a profound truth: Vulnerability—the willingness to show up and be seen with no guarantee of outcome—is the only path to more love, belonging, creativity, and joy. But living a brave life is not always easy: We are, inevitably, going to stumble and fall.
Wholeness After Betrayal: Restoring Trust in the Wake of Sexual Misconduct by Robin Hammeal-Urban offers an understanding of the brokenness and divisions created following sexual misconduct in a congregation. This specialized instruction is tested and proven, having been used effectively many times in a variety of congregational settings. It holds tremendous value for institutional healing, both immediately following misconduct or even decades later.
Healthy Churches, Faithful Pastors: Covenant Expectations for Thriving Together by David Keck presents fifty expectation statements examples of what pastors and congregations can expect of one another; a vital resource to anyone who seeks to initiate a discussion of expectations in their own church.